I could have let yesterday knock me for six but far from it, as nowadays I turn all adversity into a positive somehow. Yes it was a challenging day – but most of what happened to me (not worth going into and anyway I don’t want to dwell on all that stuff) was far outside of my control. What I could control I did and told myself that this was all a useful learning situation.
At one time I would have beaten myself up pretty hard in the same situation. I am now older, wiser and have used self-hypnosis to banish all that negative thinking from my life.
How about you?
What are you talking to yourself about today?
Do you automatically think “I’m rubbish or I’m useless” if you do something wrong, or assume that if your neighbour ignores you, she must hate you? What does that do to your self esteem and confidence?
Negative thinking is the enemy of your self-esteem and if you identify with any of the following please take some action to rid yourself of these self destructive shackles.
1. Making everything personal
Do you blame yourself for everything that goes wrong even if the event is largely outside your control? “If I had only stayed at home the cat would not have gone missing”.
2. Filtering and letting the negative dominate
One negative happening, such as a rude comment made to you during an otherwise enjoyable evening changes your whole perspective on the evening and puts you on a downer. Ninety nine per cent of the evening was fun but the small negative moment registers most.
3. Rejecting praise
Closing off the positive such as a compliment, affectionate gesture or praise goes unnoticed, ignored or deflected; you might reply with, ‘It’s no big deal.’ You have just belittled something that others really appreciated and thought until you told them differently that it was a big deal
4. Drawing false conclusions
You draw negative conclusions without getting your facts straight. You try and predict the future or guess what someone else is feeling ‘My friend is very quiet, she must be angry with me.’ Now – really – why that conclusion? There may be other things on your friends mind.
5. Negative reasoning
You are sure that your negative opinion of a situation reflects reality. Such as: ‘My husband leaves the loo seat up just to annoy me.’ Hey – he is just being a typical man – more-like!
6. Labelling yourself
Rather than learning from a mistake and using it as an experience that
has helped you grow as a person, you label yourself negatively: ‘I’m a
failure.’ You do the same to other people too: ‘She’s so rude.’
7. ‘Should’ be doing
You adhere to being a perfectionist and following certain rules about what you ‘should’ be doing. You feel useless and guilty when you can’t stick to your rules.
One negative event, such as an insult from your partner or an argument with someone causes you to exaggerate the situation. For example, you might think, ‘She’s always cold’ or ‘You can’t trust anyone.’
9. Perfectionist – All or nothing
If you don’t perform with perfection, then you consider yourself a complete failure.
Negative thoughts don’t have to be a way of life, you can ‘unlearn’ self-defeating ways of thinking that pave the way toward mood disorders.
Here is something you could do that is positive – right now.
Go checkout Adam Eason’s products and in particular “Supreme Self Esteem”, “High Self Esteem in 21 Days” or “Ultimate Confidence” and kick those No No self-destructive negative thoughts into touch.